Moving into a New Year

Moving into a New Year is not the same..I’m not excited I don’t want to celebrate because with every new year reality sets in and more time is added to my life that she isn’t a part of..If you’ve wondered how we are doing..We are surviving..we appreciate the blessings Gods given us we face the next day because we weren’t given a choice and we smile because as much as we don’t want to Cameron deserves nothing less and most of all we pray for peace and comfort from the only one who can provide it..I’m going to end by sharing my biggest blessing of 2014. You see I was having a really bad day missing Sydney and hurting because of lies regrding the accident and a few ppl saying awful things about Sydney..I couldn’t believe that I was walking through the loss of my daughter and now I was dealing with such evil from those who she thought loved her..I was in my flesh broken and not wanting to move wondering why God would add this burden on me after everything..I was screaming and crying on my bed..Satan had beaten me down I wanted to give up..quit..but at that moment I heard her voice whisper its ok Mommie I’ve given you everything you need..it touched me so much that at 10:46 am on June 3rd I tweeted it. I thought at that moment she was talking about all her other writings but at that moment as peaceful as I felt I still had no idea what God had truly waiting for me to find..then about 3:30 that afternoon I found the attached in a notes section on her phone under an email I hadn’t known about before..because she was using her phone the time and date she typed this was logged under her name..she typed this approximately 7 hours before she would be leaving me to spend eternity w/God himself. At 16 she took the time to stop and type these affirmations into her phone..all of her writings address something we have struggled with and have at times given us the strength to keep going but this one is by far the most profound being written just hours before the accident. I suffer everyday missing her but there is not a doubt in my mind EVER that she watches over me as I’m blessed with sharing her legacy smiling waiting until the day we are finally reunited! I’m forever blessed by the love and faith I see in her and I will wake up every single day hoping and praying to be someone that makes her as proud as she has made me. I love you Sydney Lisa Jeter forever and always