I was completely satisfied with just being there..but God had so much more in store for me


When I initially got tickets to Spirit Fest 2015 I was just exited to be able to go and be a part of it..as the months passed and I checked the entertainer lineup it just kept getting better and better..All my favorites..and one that will forever hold a special place in my heart.  Anyone who was at Sydney’s service knows that the last song she heard was By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North..I can’t help but think of her and feel her presence anytime I hear the song. It was such a blessing to know they would be a part of spirit fest and I would get to see them perform again..At this point I’m more than satisfied, its more than I would have even asked for..but I had no idea the special moments God would have in store for me that night..I never attend an event without I think you’re beautiful cards, or a couple of books.  I’ve usually already thought and planned to who or where I’m going to give share the books, but for some reason I brought them but didn’t really plan on giving them out.. Then I saw on the program they had set up autograph sessions with some of the bands and one was Tenth Avenue North..As I made arrangements to be there for the autograph session I kept thinking I would give them a copy of her book..we decided to see if they would autograph the cover of one of my extra books..I don’t usually get all shaky and nervous, but I guess even though I was filled with joy and happiness at the opportunity God was giving me, my emotions were unavoidable..As I stepped up to Mike (the singer) I was able to take a moment and tell him a little bit of Sydney’s story and told him why I was giving him a copy of her book..I asked if he would take a picture with her book and of course he didn’t hesitate, and then just a few hours later I’m standing right in front of the stage..watching an amazing performance and I get a tweet telling me I’ve won a special prize..I wasn’t able to leave where I was without losing my place so my friend Missy asked them if they would hold it until Tenth Avenue North finished..after the performance my mom and I headed to see what I won..I’m still thinking its a t shirt or a photo or something…so when I walked up to find that I had won an autographed guitar I was more than overwhelmed..I was basically speechless..The guitar was autographed by all the artist who performed at Spirit Fest 2015..that would be Third Day, David Crowder, Matthew West, Matt Maher, Tenth Avenue North, Sidewalk Prophets, Francesca Battistelli, Danny Gokey, Mr Talkbox, Dan Bremnes, Jon Guerra, and I think a few more..What an amazing gift and blessing..God truly had his hands on me and my life..A special thank you Spirit Fest and Mike from Tenth Avenue North for becoming a part of her legacy



A little bit of the story behind the card…I think you’re beautiful <3 Sydney :D

PicMonkey CollageIf you’ve received one of Sydney’s cards I hope you feel the love of an angel surrounding you and I hope you know that you are beautiful ❤ Your card is our way of keeping Sydney’s memory and love alive..we hope that you consider sending the card with a pay it forward or sharing it with someone you know who may need to be reminded that no matter how they feel they are beautiful not only to others but to God who has made us in his own image. If you would like to share your story of why you shared your card or how it felt to receive the card feel free to leave a comment for others to read.

On the 2 yr anniversary of Sydney accident I was blessed with an amazing gift. Jill Presnal and I had become friends over the last two years and on many occasions she’d listened to me talk about Sydney and the way she “loved” not just me but everyone around her.
I asked Jill to share the story of why she made the cards:


I always loved seeing Sydney’s sweet notes on your Facebook and twitter feed- a bright spot in my day. The handwritten one on the post it was my favorite and I saved it to my phone. Maybe because I am a boy mom and don’t get little love notes hidden away is why it really touched me. The sweetness and simpleness of a little love note to make someone smile and feel loved. I would come across it when looking for a picture and it would always make me smile. I love the simpleness of it- her own handwriting on a little yellow post it note, tucked away in your bible for you to find. The simpleness of it but with a HUGE impact.

She thought ahead and wanted to make you smile, feel loved, know that you are beautiful. And she did this not just for her mom, but for so many. Bible verses, Instragram posts, kind notes giving others support and love and comfort.
In our world it is rare to come across someone so giving and kind that lifts others up. I thought- wouldn’t it be nice to get a sweet love note like that from someone? A surprise, tucked away in your purse, or book, or even for a stranger- on their windshield. So that is where the idea started- spread Sydney’s love and kindness all around. In a world where there is so much sadness, anger, pain- we all need love and kindness. What a perfect way to brighten someone’s day or surprise a friend or stranger. I have one on my visor by a very special picture and whenever I flip it down and see the photo with Sydney’s sweet words I smile. And I hope that is what everyone does when they get a Sydney love note, smile and feel loved.

IMG_9015The I think you’re beautiful card originated from a post it note Sydney left in my bible. She was always leaving what I would call “love” notes or encouraging notes for people to find. I believe God knew I would need some encouraging words from her so he had her leave it for me to find..after the accident I began using Sydney’s bible when I attended church or bible study because it made me feel close to her. So I didn’t end up finding this extremely cherished “love” note until several months after the accident.

It has been (by far) one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received because she has given me a way to continue “loving” people the way Sydney would have loved them if she were here.


Two more of Sydney’s “love” notes The first one was left for one of her soccer team mates and the last one she wrote on her Daddy’s grocery list. She was at the end of her Sophomore year of high school when she left these so those around her would know how much they meant to her. I challenge you..I challenge you to stop for a minute and let someone know how much you love them or that you think they rock your socks, or that they are beautiful

What I used to love I now almost hate

Halloween used to provide so much excitement and happiness for our family. It was one of the holidays we looked forward to..I would have easily said I loved Halloween but now it provides so much pain and emptiness. The last two years we stayed home not really participating in the holiday so when Cameron wanted to join our friends and their family for Halloween I was excited and happy but as the days got closer the emptiness seemed to be continually moving in on me. I will say I fought hard and am very grateful that I got to see my son participate in Halloween for the first time since his sister’s accident. I will never feel the same about Halloween..it takes everything in me not to hate it. It is so hard to continue living for Cameron when I’m dying inside. I couldn’t have made it with out two of my amazing friends who are willing to let us be a part of their families celebration no matter how broken or how bad I’m hurting. Life doesn’t stop and you truly never realize how many holidays there are until they provide pain instead of joy. Thankful God has blessed us with amazing friends who aren’t scared of tears and are willing to love and include us no matter what..