The 10th rolls around again..my sweet girl…Sydney Lisa Jeter
Well here we are as the 10th rolls around again this time marking 11 month without her. It still feels like yesterday I was sitting on the street screaming NO however as much as my life has remained stuck in that moment others have moved on with life. Some here for us the first several months as the shock of losing someone they loved filled their heart with the desire to be close to her family as they needed closure. Some shockingly attacked a grieving family and Sydney’s memory with lies, and hatred. We tried desperately to look the other way, ignore, contact parents who refuse to either sit down with us or do what is necessary to actually parent a child and teach them appropriate behavior. I will never understand why on top of losing my daughter I’ve had to deal with such dishonor and disrespect by people who claimed to love her but obviously by their actions do not. When crying out to a friend I asked why God would allow the extra suffering when I was already barely breathing and she said I can not explain why your suffering continues or why evil people continue to plague you. I think the devil works overtime to try to turn you away. She said this tells me that something you are doing is hurting him and furthering the kingdom of God. I hope and pray that is true..that at least if I have to feel all this horrible pain and live knowing that people could disrespect someone as beautiful of a person as Sydney inside and out…that God’s kingdom would grow. It doesn’t make it easier to feel or go through, but my hearts desire is to Glorify God in all that I do..Now to the last group of people…the ones that realized that our family didn’t just need people in the first weeks and months..as Sydney isn’t just gone for that amount of time…she’s gone forever and helping us is a lifelong walk..It’s knowing we have a piece missing for the rest of our lives and offering to step in and fill the emptiness..its knowing Cameron misses having older kids around and continuing to show up and tell him how amazing his sister was or how much she loved and talked about him…It’s showing up and hanging out at the house to help fill the emptiness with laughter and craziness that left with her…we want to do things she loved with people that knew and loved her..Its knowing that by the time a grieving person reaches out for help they have sat in the depths of their darkness way too long. Please say her name, share your stories with us..let us know that the time we selflessly shared her with other people was worth it..don’t keep your memories hidden in your head or your heart…its a blessing when you share them with us and helps us make it until we see her again. 11 months is way too long without her and the more time moves the more these little things become big things. Thank you and God Bless everyone walking this journey with us.