Sydney’s post 5 years ago

There is an app you can put on your phone that goes back and grabs things you posted on this exact day years before on your social media..I have Sydney’s placed on my phone..This was her post 5 years ago..I remember that birthday so well..I remember them all but 13 was a mile stone the day you finally make it to being a teenager..she was so excited. I wish so badly I could go back to that day..I would probably hug her so tight I would break her..the last birthday I spent with her was 16 another mile stone that she not so patiently waited for..tomorrow is the next mile stone but she didn’t get to make it..She would be 18..My morning won’t be filled with excitement, a special breakfast, hugs, or singing..instead her room will be empty..so very empty..I’m trying my hardest to stay strong but this pain is consuming me as I face this life without her smile her laughter her excitement but mostly her love..Cameron asked if we could send her a cake attached to balloons..I told him we could most likely send a cupcake..he knows deep inside that she won’t get it..but he also knows that she will know he sent it and when your heart is broken and you are missing someone you love so much it is impossible to do nothing when you know you would have been doing so much. I learn everyday that this walk isn’t getting easier..I miss her so much more everyday I spend without her..we were a complete family with her and without her we are broken and wounded..I know for many her death came and went..time has allowed you to forget the shock and reality of it all..but for some time doesn’t allow the reality to go away..we can’t run from it or away from it..the words spoken on the news “Sydney Jeter a 16 years old high school student at A&M Consolidated was killed last night in a roll over accident” will forever be ringing in our ears..learning to live without her is a challenge we face each morning the minute our eyes open..time is a positive and a negative..as each day is a day we had to spend without her but it is also the only thing that gets us closer to seeing her..please continue to pray that God gives us the strength we are going to need to face her 18th birthday without her