I’m just a little different when it comes to sharing messages..I don’t just want to speak something to someone I want them to understand..get it..feel it..God’s not Dead was a very good movie but very emotional for me..I already had an extremely hard time at church crying the whole way through worship..because not only do I miss Sydney more than anything..I know she’s happy and experiencing for real every word we sing..then emotionally heart broken we head to the movie..I had never even seen a preview..So many little messages through out that movie for us..first off..sometimes the answer is NO..boy this one hurts..we didn’t want our answer to be no..We knew something was wrong that night..she was never late and always stayed in communication with me so when I left to go look for her..Stacy was on his knees in the front yard praying to God “please let her be ok”..I was praying the same prayer as I was driving out to go look for her..our answer was No..I do not believe that God took her that night..But I do believe he allowed free will..and the decisions made..did take her that night..her work was not finished..but God worked through Sydney’s life and will work through her death..the messages he had her leave for us to find..the post she shared on Instagram and Facebook..are there for others to see..to see how her heart changed that last year..I believe I also saw this message through the movie..God knows our life..our story has been written..he knows we have free will but never gives up..every time you are tempted by selfish desires..God has also provided a way out..the teacher had his mom speaking truth..when he rejected God didnt give up..he sent someone else a student/girlfriend to love and plant seeds..he still rejected..but God still loved so he sent the student who would end up debating w/him who also planted seeds..but still rejecting..God didn’t give up..he continued sending people into his life..God never gives up on us knowing we may never accept..THANK YOU GOD..you see he didn’t give up on my baby either..as she was struggling he continued to send ppl into her life to speak truth..she grabbed on several times but would get sucked back into the world a few times but the last time..The Holy Spirit was so strong..she understood..she grabbed on..changing everything about herself..she deleted her twitter, changed the music she listened to..she was pulling away from people that were bad influences, reaching out an offering forgiveness, she used her social media to share Gods message to try and save people from the lies Satan tells them..it was beautiful and I was blessed to have been able to witness such a powerful change..all this because God never gave up on her..he continued to send OBEDIENT ppl into her life..she always had a choice to walk away..Thank God her last choice was to whole heartedly give every bit of her life to such an amazing God..So I will end by asking you..which person are you going to be in this life..the one that speaks against God..the one that lives for the world and just signs a piece of paper to make their life easy or the one who will chose to be obedient, and live so that God can use you..you might just be the last truth someone hears..Thank you to every obedient Christian who walked through my daughters life..You allowed God to use your life because you lived for him and not yourself and Thank you to my beautiful girl Sydney Lisa Jeter God is still working good through your obedience what a beautiful legacy you left..I miss you!
I haven’t posted since the New Year started. Honestly I guess I don’t want to admit that I had to start a year without her. Today marks 6 months that she has been gone. Thats half a year. The feelings are unexplainable as it seems like just yesterday I was sitting on the side of the road in the pitch dark with red blue and white lights flashing all around me being told she was gone but also forever since I’ve gotten to hear her or hug her. Memories and pictures feel like they just happened. I remember them like it was yesterday. The only explanation I can give to our survival is that we have leaned on and kept God close every second of everyday. We try very hard to stay focused on his will, his love, and his forgiveness so that the what ifs don’t rip us to pieces. I chose this picture as my first picture because I want to remind everyone what was important to her. She wrote this for herself as none of us knew about it until it was found in her bible the day everyone was told of the accident. She wrote it after doing a bible study from a book so I know she had to have written it sometime after May 18th when I purchased the book. Not even 2 months before she left us. Every time I read this I have to tell myself she was only 16 yrs old. She didn’t ask to be remembered for her beauty, what clothes she had, how popular she was, or pushing the limits of life. She wanted to leave a legacy that was honoring and pleasing to God. As we struggle through this life without her We stay focused on Gods promises as he holds her with him until we are blessed with seeing her again! Missing and remembering how blessed we were is the new normal for our family. Thank you to everyone who continues to pray for us.
7/10/13…8/10/13…9/10/13…10/10/13…11/10/13 and now 12/10/13. The last month of 2013 once Jan rolls around we will be in a new year..a year that my baby never got to be alive in. Just another reminder that my precious girl is gone and not coming back. I’m trying so hard to be strong and to continue living and doing things with Stacy and Cameron. We’ve been to aggie games, high school football games, movies, bowling, fishing, disc golf, hunting, and I’m sure I’m leaving something out. We are trying to continue living to make her proud she has only been gone 5 months I think we have done pretty good however the hole in our hearts and the agonizing pain never lets up. It is a constant battle to continue living this life without her. The tears don’t stop and the pain actually seems to get worse with time. I’m scared of what the Holidays are going to do to me. I’m scared of hurting worse then I already do because I’m not sure I can take it. If it wasn’t for God I wouldn’t have made it this far. The hope he offers in eternal life with no more pain and no more tears a life spent with him and being reunited with my beautiful girl is the only thing that sustains me through the darkness. In one of the books she read that changed her heart she highlighted “if you are suffering in a manner that pleases God, keep doing what is right, and trust your lives to the God who created you, for he will never fail you 1 Peter 4:19” she knew just what to leave for me to find. Its almost as if she was talking to me from Heaven. I am just a Mom struggling everyday to find hope, and peace in this life though losing my daughter whom I loved so very much. Trying to attain the level of faith and trust she had in her God at the end of her life. I am missing her more and more each day. Love you Sydney Lisa Jeter forever and always!
I miss my baby girl. Sometimes I read her writing and ask God why he let someone leave that had fully given their life to him? She was touching people’s lives and she was reaching out and doing his work. I’m left here hurting as I read the wisdom of a 16 year old something most of us don’t even get as adults. She was a precious gift to all she loved and everyone of them should feel personally blessed by God to have had someone love them the way she did. She loved with her whole heart unselfishly with every inch of her soul. Stacy and I feel so lost without her. We don’t know how to live life without her not do we want to….My prayer…God let it be your will not mine but promise to continue to walk right beside me when your will does not match up with mine.
Just one of the many writings my baby left for us…there is no doubt she was living her life focused on eternity. Read what she wrote and then realize she was just 16 years old. God can use them no matter their age if they are willing to seek him,love him, and live for him. This is why I am filled with so much sorrow. The gifts he had blessed her with I miss in my life. I miss her encouragement, her love for others, and of course how much she loved me. I wished I would have found these things while she was alive so I could have told her how proud I was of her and her choice to live her life for Gods eternal promises and not the false promises that satan temps us with. We often say that someone’s beauty comes from within…and her beauty still shines through her writings. I will continue to say how blessed I was to be her mom. In case you can’t read her writing it says “when you are hurt use that pain and desire to be loved and pour love into others with kind words because we will celebrate the short lives we lived on this earth for eternity”
This was the last text conversation I had with her that night. She came home after that and was so very happy and playful before they left for ice cream. I’m so glad I took the time to text her and tell her how proud I was watching them walk out of church carrying their bibles. I can’t wait until the day I’m blessed to see her again.
Found my sweet girl’s tumblr. She was so strong in her faith and wanted everyone to know God’s love. In my flesh I’m struggling everyday with her being gone. I miss her every second I’m never sure how I’m going to make it through the next day without her smile and laughter then I find something like this and I realize I make it through everyday because God is watching over me and she is right next to him saying you can do it Mom I Love You!