Tag Archives: God

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Victory in Jesus

. Getting to Know Sydney, Grief its Real . , , , , , , , ,

Today I celebrate the resurrection of Jesus with a humbled thankful heart. I understand the victory like never before because I am already reaping the benefits of his sacrifice and victorious win over death. Because he LIVES my baby is not only alive but she is with The Prince of Peace, her redeemer, her bridegroom, The Son of God and she has received her crown. She is in a perfect place where time doesn’t exist, for her..the blink of her eye will be a lifetime for me. This is the reason I continue each day..this gift this promise this victory will also be mine one day and I will be reunited with my girl and will live eternity with her and God. I may not have the a window into heaven like I asked for but God blessed me with the gift to create pictures that seem as if I do❤️

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Are you in the middle?

. Grief its Real . , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I used to think that bad things didn’t happen to good people..when I look back now I can see I felt that way because I was only processing the part of the bible I wanted to..When I thought about Daniel and the lions den I thought about his victory and survival. I paid attention to the beginning and the end but not the middle. I see now that God unveiled his faithfulness to others at the end but in the middle is where God is personally at work and proves his faithfulness to you. The middle is where we experience God in ways that allow us to see things differently and grow closer to him. The middle is where without God you can’t survive..The middle doesn’t feel good and it isn’t comfortable..the middle is where the potter’s pottery is spinning and the shape is changing and if you continue to stay in the potters hands the middle is where that crazy piece of clay that looks messy and disfigured is spun into something beautiful. Without the middle you’re just a piece of clay but after going through the middle you look different to the world. That’s when they can see God’s work within you. If your in the middle trust and know that the middle is where you get to meet God personally🙏🏻

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Beauty out of Ashes 

. Getting to Know Sydney, Grief its Real, Sydney's Book . , , , , , , , , , , ,

‪I remember the day I stood face to face w/my faith..face to face w/my belief in the word..the day I had to answer the question Is God alone enough..just days before Sydney and I were discussing this very subject. I assured her that as long as she had God the rest didn’t matter. Honestly at the time I was thinking that if you had God then everything else in life would fall into place. I was encouraging her to trust that if God was asking her to remove people from her life that even if he didn’t replace them, as long as she had God she had all she needed. So she began putting space between the relationships she felt didn’t honor God. Some she knew would die completely but some she felt she could still hold onto as long as she was wearing the amour of God when she was with them. If she was keeping the relationship her sole desire was to bring them into a relationship with God alongside her. She purposely and strategically thought about how when and where she would hang out with them. She decided one on one would be better than the usual group atmosphere as it was easier to protect herself and keep her focus on God. She made sure the environment she hung out with them in was a safe place for her..she invited them to her house and asked me to help her continue to honor God even when the get together wasn’t a bible study and the person didn’t know God. So the day I stood face to face with not only my faith and belief but death and a separation I could never have even imagined was 7/11/13 not 7/10/13 because yes Sydney took her last breathe on 7/10/13 but it wasn’t until 3am on 7/11/13 when I was told my daughter didn’t make it and it was 7/11/13 when I sat at my kitchen table wondering how I could survive..scared I would never feel joy and happiness again..the day the question started roaring through my mind “Is God alone enough?” I knew what the right answer was and began to realize the real question roaring through my mind was.. Did I BELIEVE God alone was enough. Before this moment in my life I had not ever had to truly answer this question..Don’t get me wrong I surely thought I had answered it I thought I had stepped out in faith but I was whole unbroken and strong. I had never faced a moment where I didn’t feel I was sort of in control. I’ve never been a materialistic person. The things that made me happy we’re people not things. I had all I needed in my life..life was not perfect..it was not a fairy tale..but my family was taking our issues to God and solving them with the word of God..so I felt at peace protected and was watching God sweep Sydney off her feet. The love and light that shined through her was nothing I had ever seen before. Sidenote: (For all those moms who want your daughters to be loved..stop teaching them they need to find this love from the world or a man..the love that will change their life is simply the LOVE OF GOD ALONE..but they can’t believe it, if you don’t believe it) I’ve always said your faith grows not in reading the word but instead when you experience God, when you live out the word when you see and feel God working in and around your life and there was no doubt God was everywhere we turned. So that day I sat there with Sydney it was easy for me to tell her God alone is enough because I had never stood face to face with the reality of it..I had never had to stand before the Giant with only a stone and I had never had to step into the burning fire trusting and believing that God would fulfill his promise and bring me out alive or walk into the raging Red Sea trusting God to separate the waters and I had never had to face a day without one of the most precious gifts I had ever received. She was everything I dreamed of and then a million times more..I continually asked God how..how was I suppose to survive when he took one of the best pieces of me..the question continued to roar in my head “Is God alone enough?”..thinking continually on my moments with Sydney knowing whole heartedly I did believe it..I believed it when I told her and I believed it now because his word says it..and if his word says it then it is truth..My relationship with God changed at that moment b/c starting this day I could not move without him..my baby was gone and the devastation was all consuming..I didn’t want to spend a day away from her and certainly not years..but I survive because of God and God alone..I survive because I know God is real because I can’t survive this yet I am..I survive because my faith and belief are REAL..I survive because it may be years but it won’t be eternity..I have seen the beauty brought out of the ashes..I have seen God bring good from the bad..He continues to allow Sydney’s life to touch people he continues to allow her to share wisdom truth and her testimony with people and she’s not even here..the beauty that comes from the ashes wont make it right and it will NEVER be ok..but it is real..it is a gift..It is Gods way of reminding me of his faithfulness..reminding me that HE ALONE IS ENOUGH. My life continues to change and be a challenge but I face each day knowing I can silence the roaring question..I may not have battled a giant or faced hungry lions but I have faced death and just as God was with them and brought them through it he is with me and brings me through it..mine is not a short fight..one throw of a stone and I won..it’s a long journey but I’m thankful I don’t live in circumstances but instead I live in truth and that truth gives me hope for something more than the circumstances I face in this life. That truth reminds me this life is temporary therefore this pain and suffering will not last forever. That truth is the reason I continue.

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There is no better way to KNOW God then to see him work through someone’s life..The beauty of God’s faithfulness

. Getting to Know Sydney, Grief its Real, Sydney's Book . , , , , , , , , ,

There seems to be a lot of talk about our belief but is there actually proof in our lives that we do actually believe. Our own thoughts about our self or the burdens life has poured upon us, keep us beat down and hesitant to go where God is asking us to go. It never fails that on my weakest days God gives me something too hard for me..Most days I immediately think (and even ask him) why me God there is a whole world filled with people…so why me.. I’m weak I’m broken I’m hurting, and ultimately unfixable..how am I suppose to help someone else when I feel like I’m the one needing help. It is then that my belief comes into play..the bible is filled with verses stating with God all things are possible. Do I believe it? Do I believe that I’m included in the “all” because if I do then it doesn’t matter what I feel it only matters what I do once my belief is there then I step forward in faith. It’s the ability to step out in faith that actually proves what we believe. Most of the time this just happen..You don’t actually make the decision to believe and then step.. you simply allow yourself to spin in the potters hands and it isn’t until he’s done that you realize the beauty he created through your life. You see Sydney didn’t believe she had led a life capable of leaving a legacy for God. I know this because she wrote out a prayer that is included in her book (I’ve attached it). This prayer was written sometime after May 23, 2013 because it’s a prayer from a book that she had me purchase that day. I’m pointing this out to show others how absolutely faithful and big God is..It’s interesting how you notice things as you study them..what I notice in this prayer is two things..one she didn’t believe she had lived a life to glorify God but then she says..I will stand on your promise that you will make something beautiful out of my brokenness and she asked him to help her live out the rest of her days to bring glory to him..The rest of her days..which she couldn’t have possibly know would only be 48..just 48 short days..but in those 48 short days..God used her life and made something beautiful out of her brokenness., and because she stood on the promises of God and because she trusted him..He used her to prove his faithfulness. I want to point out one more time what she wrote in that prayer and follow it with scripture…She wrote I will stand on your promise that you will make something beautiful out of my brokenness..and scripture says Isaiah 49:23 “She who trusts in the Lord will never be disappointed.” And Luke 1:45 Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her..As of today we have shared 123 of Sydney’s books filled with scripture and God’s truth. In 48 short days he truly blessed her with A Legacy of a Lifetime! So the next time you feel like you can’t do what God’s asking you to do or maybe you feel like your too broken stand firm in your belief of scripture and remember Sydney and how God was faithful and created beauty out of what she saw as brokenness
 
  
   

  

  

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What I used to love I now almost hate

. Grief its Real . , , , , , , ,

Halloween used to provide so much excitement and happiness for our family. It was one of the holidays we looked forward to..I would have easily said I loved Halloween but now it provides so much pain and emptiness. The last two years we stayed home not really participating in the holiday so when Cameron wanted to join our friends and their family for Halloween I was excited and happy but as the days got closer the emptiness seemed to be continually moving in on me. I will say I fought hard and am very grateful that I got to see my son participate in Halloween for the first time since his sister’s accident. I will never feel the same about Halloween..it takes everything in me not to hate it. It is so hard to continue living for Cameron when I’m dying inside. I couldn’t have made it with out two of my amazing friends who are willing to let us be a part of their families celebration no matter how broken or how bad I’m hurting. Life doesn’t stop and you truly never realize how many holidays there are until they provide pain instead of joy. Thankful God has blessed us with amazing friends who aren’t scared of tears and are willing to love and include us no matter what..

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Your greatest contribution to the kingdom may not be something you did but someone you raise

. Getting to Know Sydney, Sydney's Book . , , , , , ,

I read something the other day that I wanted to share..It was a statement that said “Your greatest contribution to the kingdom may not be something you do..but someone you raise.” when I read this I immediately thought of Sydney Lisa Jeter Many of you have heard me talk about Sydney’s writings we found after the accident. We made a scrapbook with them and displayed it on the year anniversary of the accident to share with those who came to support and love us. As people read through her writings many asked if there was a way to make a copy of the book to be able to share with others AND….with the help of my amazing sister in law Tanya and three friends Kristi, Cathy, and Marilyn WE DID IT. We made the book as inexpensive as possible, and if you catch the right sale you can get it for about 25 dollars. This book is filled with amazing wisdom and truth that Stacy and I believe will help anyone who choses to read it. She wanted to leave a legacy..In her OWN words she said she wanted to be known for her faith and devotion to God and always trusting him with her life.She wanted to be known as knowledable thoughtful and someone who gives good Godly advice..This is what she wanted her Legacy to be..and what a faithful God to work through her to end up fulfilling her hearts desire. When I think of Sydney’s legacy I will forever be reminded of Luke 1:45 Blessed is she who believed The Lord would fulfill his promises to her. 

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Easter the cross and a deeper understanding

. Grief its Real . , , , , , , ,

This week last year was one of my hardest weeks, and this year seems to be no different. I am not a person who enjoys watching torture movies or likes to hear of anyone suffering from someone else inflicting pain on them even if it is only for a moment. So when I think of this week and all that Jesus would have to endure it overwhelms me. I don’t know if it’s because honestly I’m 100 percent positive I would not have been capable of doing the same for him or because I have stood face to face with the reality that his suffering and death, saved not only me but my daughter. He did for her something that no matter how much I loved her I couldn’t do for her. I relate to some of his last moments but will never truly be able to comprehend his agony and anguish. He prayed to his father asking if there is any way for this hour to pass from him to please let it pass, but for God’s will to be done. The answer to his prayer was obviously no. I’m not sure many know the night of the accident as I drove off to look for her. Stacy fell to his knees on our front lawn and Prayed to God begging him to please let her be okay..basically we were saying if there is anyway this hour could pass for us please let it..Our answer was also no..from that moment on our life would never be the same because I KNEW every single day no matter how much I prayed, or how much I glorified God my answer was still going to be no and I would have to continue to live everyday broken fighting hard for those pieces to be enough for Cameron. The only hope we have being the promises God gave us..a promise that even though it won’t be easy it would be worth it. I have days I can’t breath, I can’t think about anything else, and I beg God to do something to ease this burden..It is such a devastating loss that at times I find myself listening to Satan’s lies that God has left us and that if he loved us he wouldn’t have taken her but the other day I was blessed to see things a different way. I said God I know you are probably the only one who truly knows the pain inside of me, you know my heart, and you know how special she was..as I’m holding my small pebble believing he has left me alone to carry this burden..He is actually holding up the mountain that is about to crush me..saying I need you to move it is not safe for you here..They key to living without Sydney is to continue to focus on living for God believing in not just John 3:16 but in every single word written in the bible. It is my protection against my flesh my mind my suffering and Satan’s lies. God needs me to keep moving, to keep walking towards him in order to survive my life without my baby girl. Please continue to pray for me and my family as we enter another Holiday without her filling our house with laughter, and craziness. Missing her is so exhausting.

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She continues to touch people lives

. Getting to Know Sydney, Grief its Real . , , , , , , , , , , ,

I believe that God is at work every day around us. He is constantly pursuing us and desperately wants us to put our own selfish desires down and follow him. I do not believe he has a check list with certain things for me and checks them off and when I’m done its my time for Heaven. I do believe that he has many things for me to do..but I have a choice..honestly we miss the opportunity to join and share God often so there would be unchecked things on our list..it doesn’t end there..he continues to give many opportunities to join him..I wake up hurting and missing Sydney..there will never be words to describe how badly I want to be with her or see her..something I am promised will happen at some point..until then I am here because God put me here..not for me but for him..Through my pain and suffering..people I loved have left and walked away from us..some even persecuting and lying about us and Sydney..breaking our hearts and causing us greater and deeper pain..but God is greater than any of that..yes it hurt and will continue to hurt..but as people stepped away..God brought others forward..people that didn’t even know Sydney..KNOW her now..I get to share my daughters words about God to help and encourage others her age to keep fighting the good fight..the beauty is..I even have it in her hand writing. What a gift God left me but what I’ve realized..he didn’t just leave it to calm my heart or protect her legacy..He left it for me to share with others. She is still living and touching people’s lives. Every time I try to bless someone else by sharing her story, her words, her favorite verses, the books that helped transform her heart..it BLESSES me. I get to see God and a piece of her shine through them. The same bright light that shined through her smile wasn’t dimmed by the lies or betrayal..by the hurt..because that light was LOVE! Thank you Sydney Lisa Jeter for following God when he pursued you for showing me that having God in my life isn’t enough if I’m not sharing him. I love you forever and always!

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Sharing the love that filled our house on the year anniversary

. Grief its Real . , , , , , , , ,

I wanted to stop by and share a little of the love that filled our house on the 10th. I know that most everyone did not actually hear of the accident until the the morning of July 11th but Sydney Lisa Jeter did actually leave us before midnight on the 10th. We spent the day on the 10th doing exactly what she would have or was doing the year before and I am so greatful and thankful for everyone that came out to help us. It was a true blessing to have people walking in and out all day long, kids playing in the pool laughing, meeting people that knew her that I didn’t know and hearing their stories of how they met her and what she meant to them, sharing the legacy God had her leave that showed her heart and soul they last two months of her life, showing people how important it was to her to separate from people and things that were pulling her away from honoring God, and the best part of the day was seeing that people were willing a year later to show up and respect and honor her. I felt the love they had for her and it touched me to my very core. For the Moms and Dads that’s children came please know I was complemented over and over by the adults here about how respectful and considerate the young adults and kids were. I cried less this day than I have any other day thanks to all who loved her in a positive way..protecting, honoring, remembering, sharing, and carrying her memory with them. I tried to take pictures with people that came by, but there was so many people..that I missed getting pictures with some very special people. Please know I am thankful for each and everyone of you that showed up, messaged me, tweeted me, or texted me whether I have a picture of you or not..you were a light shining on me! This is a journey that is never ending as the next two days mark a year from the visitation and her funeral but everyday I suffer missing such an amazingly beautiful soul that meant the world to me. We appreciate all those who have continue praying for our family.

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Colossians 3:2

. Getting to Know Sydney, Grief its Real . , , , , , , , , ,

Colossians 3:2 Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth!! Life isn’t about what you accumulate this side of heaven..Its about what you accumulate FOR ETERNITY! Luke 1:45 Blessed is she who believed that The Lord would fulfill his promises to her. Miss you always and forever Sydney!
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