I smiled some this last week but I cried even harder

I smiled some this last week but I cried even harder. I’m thankful for any second that I can smile or laugh but it’s usually followed by an extreme feeling of wishing she had been with me for the laughter. I know how strong she was and how strong she wants us to be. She was so focused on following God and letting people know that he was the answer. This is a picture of her closet where every morning at 7am she got up and had her quite time. She was 16 and set this up all herself. She gave up half her closet space and made a chair out of a big pillow two pillow pets and a blanket so that she could have no distractions. This is probably one of my favorite things she did..it shows where her heart was and how important God was to her. I often think if I could just see into Heaven and watch her smiling with Jesus it would help. I know as hard as it is everyday, we survive because God never leaves our side no matter how alone we feel or how bad we want her back. Love and miss you Sydney always and forever!