I used to think that bad things didn’t happen to good people..when I look back now I can see I felt that way because I was only processing the part of the bible I wanted to..When I thought about Daniel and the lions den I thought about his victory and survival. I paid attention to the beginning and the end but not the middle. I see now that God unveiled his faithfulness to others at the end but in the middle is where God is personally at work and proves his faithfulness to you. The middle is where we experience God in ways that allow us to see things differently and grow closer to him. The middle is where without God you can’t survive..The middle doesn’t feel good and it isn’t comfortable..the middle is where the potter’s pottery is spinning and the shape is changing and if you continue to stay in the potters hands the middle is where that crazy piece of clay that looks messy and disfigured is spun into something beautiful. Without the middle you’re just a piece of clay but after going through the middle you look different to the world. That’s when they can see God’s work within you. If your in the middle trust and know that the middle is where you get to meet God personally🙏🏻
Tag Archives: Sydney Jeter
Are you in the middle?
Beauty out of AshesÂ
‪I remember the day I stood face to face w/my faith..face to face w/my belief in the word..the day I had to answer the question Is God alone enough..just days before Sydney and I were discussing this very subject. I assured her that as long as she had God the rest didn’t matter. Honestly at the time I was thinking that if you had God then everything else in life would fall into place. I was encouraging her to trust that if God was asking her to remove people from her life that even if he didn’t replace them, as long as she had God she had all she needed. So she began putting space between the relationships she felt didn’t honor God. Some she knew would die completely but some she felt she could still hold onto as long as she was wearing the amour of God when she was with them. If she was keeping the relationship her sole desire was to bring them into a relationship with God alongside her. She purposely and strategically thought about how when and where she would hang out with them. She decided one on one would be better than the usual group atmosphere as it was easier to protect herself and keep her focus on God. She made sure the environment she hung out with them in was a safe place for her..she invited them to her house and asked me to help her continue to honor God even when the get together wasn’t a bible study and the person didn’t know God. So the day I stood face to face with not only my faith and belief but death and a separation I could never have even imagined was 7/11/13 not 7/10/13 because yes Sydney took her last breathe on 7/10/13 but it wasn’t until 3am on 7/11/13 when I was told my daughter didn’t make it and it was 7/11/13 when I sat at my kitchen table wondering how I could survive..scared I would never feel joy and happiness again..the day the question started roaring through my mind “Is God alone enough?” I knew what the right answer was and began to realize the real question roaring through my mind was.. Did I BELIEVE God alone was enough. Before this moment in my life I had not ever had to truly answer this question..Don’t get me wrong I surely thought I had answered it I thought I had stepped out in faith but I was whole unbroken and strong. I had never faced a moment where I didn’t feel I was sort of in control. I’ve never been a materialistic person. The things that made me happy we’re people not things. I had all I needed in my life..life was not perfect..it was not a fairy tale..but my family was taking our issues to God and solving them with the word of God..so I felt at peace protected and was watching God sweep Sydney off her feet. The love and light that shined through her was nothing I had ever seen before. Sidenote: (For all those moms who want your daughters to be loved..stop teaching them they need to find this love from the world or a man..the love that will change their life is simply the LOVE OF GOD ALONE..but they can’t believe it, if you don’t believe it) I’ve always said your faith grows not in reading the word but instead when you experience God, when you live out the word when you see and feel God working in and around your life and there was no doubt God was everywhere we turned. So that day I sat there with Sydney it was easy for me to tell her God alone is enough because I had never stood face to face with the reality of it..I had never had to stand before the Giant with only a stone and I had never had to step into the burning fire trusting and believing that God would fulfill his promise and bring me out alive or walk into the raging Red Sea trusting God to separate the waters and I had never had to face a day without one of the most precious gifts I had ever received. She was everything I dreamed of and then a million times more..I continually asked God how..how was I suppose to survive when he took one of the best pieces of me..the question continued to roar in my head “Is God alone enough?”..thinking continually on my moments with Sydney knowing whole heartedly I did believe it..I believed it when I told her and I believed it now because his word says it..and if his word says it then it is truth..My relationship with God changed at that moment b/c starting this day I could not move without him..my baby was gone and the devastation was all consuming..I didn’t want to spend a day away from her and certainly not years..but I survive because of God and God alone..I survive because I know God is real because I can’t survive this yet I am..I survive because my faith and belief are REAL..I survive because it may be years but it won’t be eternity..I have seen the beauty brought out of the ashes..I have seen God bring good from the bad..He continues to allow Sydney’s life to touch people he continues to allow her to share wisdom truth and her testimony with people and she’s not even here..the beauty that comes from the ashes wont make it right and it will NEVER be ok..but it is real..it is a gift..It is Gods way of reminding me of his faithfulness..reminding me that HE ALONE IS ENOUGH. My life continues to change and be a challenge but I face each day knowing I can silence the roaring question..I may not have battled a giant or faced hungry lions but I have faced death and just as God was with them and brought them through it he is with me and brings me through it..mine is not a short fight..one throw of a stone and I won..it’s a long journey but I’m thankful I don’t live in circumstances but instead I live in truth and that truth gives me hope for something more than the circumstances I face in this life. That truth reminds me this life is temporary therefore this pain and suffering will not last forever. That truth is the reason I continue.
Happy 20th Birthday Sydney Lisa Jeter
My heart is so broken because you were just so amazing. From the little spitfire at 18 months old so boldly telling me to leave you alone to the amazing young lady you became who desired nothing more than to share the love of God you found with other who felt broken and worthless. I wonder what your earthly birthday is like in heaven I know you probably don’t celebrate being born on this earth in heaven but I wonder do you celebrate that as the day you met me and your daddy for the first time? This is my 4th birthday without you, but it still hurts as bad as the 1st one. I thought I would bless your page with a little bit of you. Happy 20th birthday my forever 16 year old baby girl. I love you FOREVER AND ALWAYS Sydney Lisa Jeter
Spreading Sydney’s love on the 3 yr anniversaryÂ
Today has been rough as it is 3 years that I was forced to say goodbye to my beautiful daughter who brought so much joy and happiness to not only to my life but so many others. I began the day with millions of tears and even questioned whether I was going to be strong enough to follow through with all the kindness acts we had planned today. I continued to fight hard to push through. Honestly it was harder than I thought it would be to focus on the positive without letting my pain devour me. Â I am blessed to know that I have some of the most amazing friends who went above and beyond to honor Sydney today. Sydney’s friends were out and about as well and two stopped by to check on us as we were leaving for our adventures so we brought them along. We filled Bryan College Station with so much of Sydney love. We had purchased gift cards to chick fil a Walmart Jj’s snow cones and McDonald’s to hand out along with balloons to children and roses because who doesn’t love flowers. I loved seeing the three teenage boys walk up to hard working nurses and hand them a rose and a gift card. We brought cookies and brownies to a few College Station Fire Stations and delivered some gift cards to The Bryan Police Station. It brought tears to my eyes to stop by and thank Shelly Carly and Holden for the creative lemonade stand. It truly blew me away. I ended my day by stopping by to tell a young boy (who has seen so much suffering himself) know how much I think about and pray for him. I wanted to encourage him and let him know that he is an amazing little boy. I got to bless him with a signed Astro’s ball thanks to Shelly Janac and Riley Ferrell and a superman shirt (with a cape) and a gift card to his favorite restraunt. I’m ending my day forever missing my beautiful girl but knowing she continue to love and touch people today thanks to everyone who stepped out to love someone because of the love Sydney so freely gave.
Happy Father’s Day: Sydney’s “dancing” was filled a little with dancing and a lot with adventures
Sydney loved to love people and I know she would have taken the time to make sure everyone knew how much she loved and adored her Daddy. Happy Fathers Day Stacy
Missing you on Mother’s Day
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I wish people could understand
Some days I wish so badly for people to understand..to understand what it takes to just take a breath..Living life after you’ve lost a child is a daily battle..what I overcome today..means nothing as I wake tomorrow and face it all over again. The best example I can give is that it’s like the movie ground hog day..I get up everyday in the same horrible reality. I remember what I did yesterday and the day before and I’m able to avoid what hurts and try something new to see if I can wake tomorrow and it be over or at least the pain and agony be less..but tomorrow’s alarm goes off and as my eyes open it all starts to happen again..day after day after day..and after almost 3 years of waking up the pain and ache of living without Sydney and forever missing a part of me hasn’t went away, it hasn’t gotten better or easier..if anything it continues to get worse..I live with the frustration of knowing I can’t fix it..that no one can fix this..you can’t force yourself to feel better..its a wrong that will never be right..Truth is with each repeating day the only thing that grows and the only thing that changes is my knowledge of God and how big he is..as I look back on my repeating nightmare..I see God everywhere..it is he who has guided and protected me..he who gives me the people who understand and love the part of me that’s left. He who offers for me to join him in helping others or loving on others who are lost in this valley. It is he who uses those who come to me for help..to actually help and encourage me..it is he who gave me such a beautiful gift to miss so much..he humbles me not because I feel like I deserve something and he reminds me that I don’t..instead he humbles me because he continues to move and make things happen that can only be from him..his blessings are far greater than what I could have thought to ask for and he is willing to give those gifts to someone who may not be able to function tomorrow..someone who fights to breath..there are so many people ready to fight each day who are whole and strong..yet he continues to wake with me everyday believing more in me than I believe in myself.
Sydney always liked to take pictures on Easter in the bluebonnets❤️Happy Easter Sydney we’re forever missing you
Bluebonnets and Sydney ❤
Spring Break Adventure for SydneyÂ
Stacy Cameron and I started spring break a little early this year..Some of our best friends have spring break the week before ours so we left out on Friday and they held over on Monday so that the boys would be able to enjoy some of spring break together. So we headed off to do Spring Break at Garner on The Frio River. If you asked Sydney her favorite place I’m pretty positive she would say The Frio and we were so blessed to get to share some of the things Sydney loved so much with our best friends. I can’t say it took away the pain because that’s impossible but Cameron got to tell stories of his last spring break with Sydney and reminisce about climbing old baldy with her and taking pictures in the same spot he took them with her. It filled my heart to hear him talk about that last trip with his friends and how much he cherishes those memories. As the week went on we continued to create memories and adventure for Sydney..I climbed and hiked (which I don’t do) Cameron and his friends got all dressed up and went to the dance (Cameron did not dance but just going would have made his sister super proud) they even gave out some of Sydney’s cards to some of the girls at the dance and me and my non dancing husband danced at the Garner Dance for my sweet Sydney❤️My heart so heavy as all we really wanted was to be watching her instead of dancing for her. It was a trip filled with old and new and for me teenage boys instead of teenage girls. I laughter I smiled..I hurt..I cried..I wished..I prayed..and I fought hard to be and do everything she would want me to do and enjoy as much as I could even though with every beat of my heart there was an ache and emptiness that rushes over every part of you but she never failed to let us know she was there loving us and encourage us ..we saw bluebonnets on the drive lady bugs and rolly pollies at the shelter indentions in rocks shaped liked hearts sun rays in our pictures and some heart shaped clouds when we hit the top of old baldy❤️
Cameron Jackson and Connor at The Dance


 The whole crew!
  Dancing for Sydney👼🏻
There is no better way to KNOW God then to see him work through someone’s life..The beauty of God’s faithfulness
There seems to be a lot of talk about our belief but is there actually proof in our lives that we do actually believe. Our own thoughts about our self or the burdens life has poured upon us, keep us beat down and hesitant to go where God is asking us to go. It never fails that on my weakest days God gives me something too hard for me..Most days I immediately think (and even ask him) why me God there is a whole world filled with people…so why me.. I’m weak I’m broken I’m hurting, and ultimately unfixable..how am I suppose to help someone else when I feel like I’m the one needing help. It is then that my belief comes into play..the bible is filled with verses stating with God all things are possible. Do I believe it? Do I believe that I’m included in the “all” because if I do then it doesn’t matter what I feel it only matters what I do once my belief is there then I step forward in faith. It’s the ability to step out in faith that actually proves what we believe. Most of the time this just happen..You don’t actually make the decision to believe and then step.. you simply allow yourself to spin in the potters hands and it isn’t until he’s done that you realize the beauty he created through your life. You see Sydney didn’t believe she had led a life capable of leaving a legacy for God. I know this because she wrote out a prayer that is included in her book (I’ve attached it). This prayer was written sometime after May 23, 2013 because it’s a prayer from a book that she had me purchase that day. I’m pointing this out to show others how absolutely faithful and big God is..It’s interesting how you notice things as you study them..what I notice in this prayer is two things..one she didn’t believe she had lived a life to glorify God but then she says..I will stand on your promise that you will make something beautiful out of my brokenness and she asked him to help her live out the rest of her days to bring glory to him..The rest of her days..which she couldn’t have possibly know would only be 48..just 48 short days..but in those 48 short days..God used her life and made something beautiful out of her brokenness., and because she stood on the promises of God and because she trusted him..He used her to prove his faithfulness. I want to point out one more time what she wrote in that prayer and follow it with scripture…She wrote I will stand on your promise that you will make something beautiful out of my brokenness..and scripture says Isaiah 49:23 “She who trusts in the Lord will never be disappointed.” And Luke 1:45 Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her..As of today we have shared 123 of Sydney’s books filled with scripture and God’s truth. In 48 short days he truly blessed her with A Legacy of a Lifetime! So the next time you feel like you can’t do what God’s asking you to do or maybe you feel like your too broken stand firm in your belief of scripture and remember Sydney and how God was faithful and created beauty out of what she saw as brokenness


